The Jig is Up

OK, so I was watching Project Runway (one of the best shows on TV, ever) and this week, they eliminated another talented designer. I don't remember her name, but she get the auf wedersen while that loony hack Blaine remained to sew something more tragic next week. And this morning, I tuned in to see the very end of that P. Diddly "Apprentice" show, and again, the loud-mouthed self-proclaimed Poprah (pop-Oprah, get it?) got to stay, while the mild-mannered whats-his-name got escorted from the building.

I know...the a$$holes who stay make for great television. Those who leave are forgetable, which is why they get kicked off. That predictable format works well on shows about finding love for rich nobodies, washed up hype men, reality show losers, and one-hit wonders. The fine print disclaimer that runs along the bottom of the screen after elimination pretty much admits that a good number of the "contestants" are there to keep us watching. But it isn't supposed to be that obvious.

In the past, it took a while to catch on to the scheme. On Season Two of PR, Santino clearly scraped the bottom of the bad taste barrel weeks earlier, but he still made it to Fashion Week. Of course, the winner that season was the forgetable Chloe, so it all makes sense in hindsight. Ditto for the phenomenon that is Omarosa--the mere mention of her name can give a show weeks of steam (which probably explains why Trump brought her back for the has-been celebrity version last fall). And as odd as it is to admit this, Dustin Diamond--perhaps the most pathetic child star loser since Danny Bonduce and Gary Coleman--single-handedly made Celebrity Fit Club worth watching again.

So conflict-casting clearly works. But it is a cheap ploy that eventually reveals the shortcomings of the show, not the actual "contestants". Once the roller coaster gets back to the gate, people get off the ride. Only kids stand in line to ride again and again. When shows have to resort to gimmicks to keep people watching, it is a sign that their ride is almost over.

PR is only in its fifth season, Diddy's show just started, and already they are pulling tricks? If they had asked me, I would have told the geniuses at Bravo that by replicating their best show, they've polluted the airways with flawed clones--Shear Genius and Top Design both suck. Top Chef is the notably exception, but its success only proves that instead of being a unique show, PR was just a template. As for Diddy, well, originality was never his thing, so it is no surprise that he would helm an Apprentice knock-off with another Angry Black Woman (ABW) at the center (more on that conflict casting device a little later). Poprah could end up duking it out on Celebrity Death Match with Omarosa.

Oh well, I guess I will just enjoy the ride...