Year-End Crisis

OK, I have not been neglecting the Cafe, but BBW is up and running!  My intentions to wait until January (tomorrow) to start the new blog were foiled when it became clear that she would not wait (in case anyone out there has ever heard a writer talk about characters leading them in certain directions, this new blog kind of declared herself and has taken me for quite a ride so far).  Anyway, I am here to share a bit before I go off the ring in the New Year with friends.

2010 was definitely a roller coaster, but what year isn't?  Sadly, this year could not end fast enough for me for reasons that I cannot fully express except to say that someone hurt me and it has yet to dissipate, despite the cheery face I have paraded around since the offending incident.

I am upset and angry, because I am the one who is suffering from this person's actions.  I am not sure that she cares about my feelings (not quite sure that she can), but it still hurts.  What she did was cruel and mean-spirited and even if time heals all wounds, there has not been enough time between the incident and today to make this go away.

So I resolved to write about it, and then leave it all here on the page in a symbolic act of leaving it behind in 2010.  Why here on the blog?  Because I expect there will come a point in time when I will want to look back to see how far I have come in dealing with my pain. 

On the BBW blog, I said that I had a series of revelations and the first one was specifically written for this situation--I will bloom where I am planted.  Right now it happens to be in a giant pile of sh&*, but that is supposedly an excellent fertilizer.  Thus, no matter how stinky and nasty the behavior directed at me becomes, I will bloom anyway. 

I do not know what 2011 holds.  Lord knows I am hoping for better days.  I pray for the person who hurt me because she truly needs prayer.  I also need prayer because I have no idea what I am facing, but since I believe that God is bigger than my problem, I am not going to worry.  I am a conqueror!