Well, I didn't make it backhere last night to post again, but that is because the husband and I took a trip to Target, and you know how that goes. We had one of those 10% coupons because he uses his Target Visa to do everything. It's kind of cool to have your own sale, even though 10% is not that much to get excited about. We get better coupons for Macy's and Hecht's in the paper without having to spend anything. Still we spent at least two hours meandering around Target because we wanted the trip to be worth the effort.
Last night I mentioned that I would return to talk about dance class or Condoleeza Rice. I prefer to write about dance class today because Condi hasn't done anything to irritate me yet (I am still in the honeymoon phase of her new appointment).
I took the adult pointe class last night, albeit in flat shoes, but still my calves were tight this morning. It's like teen pointe class all over again. Can you believe that I spent four years in that class and I never improved on pointe! I could barely stand in those shoes, so dancing in them was nearly impossible. Last night, I felt the same angst about not being good enough, but then I thought about the pain and got over it pretty quickly.
I started back at ballet in earnest in 2003, and it has been great. I started taking jazz this summer, and that has also been pretty cool. So I usually take two classes a week. Beginning next week, I'll be taking three, but that will only be for a few weeks until my schedule changes in late March (more on that later). I'm switching between classes so that I can participate in the recital in June.
My biggest achievement has been my work with the dance company at my studio. My teacher asked me to consider joining them last year and I originally thought she was crazy. First of all, I have never been very comfortable performing in front of people because of my height. Dancers tend to be short and petite, and I am 5'10" so I always felt awkward. It took years before I finally felt comfortable dancing in front of an audience. Second, I had just gotten back into ballet class consistently. I left the studio for college in 1990, and for years, I took classes sporadically. Finally, while I was technically proficient in ballet, I had very little experience in jazz, which was the basis of the company's repetoire.
But I considered her offer and took her jazz class during the summer. At first, it was a spectacular failure because I was just not used to moving my body that way and I looked terrible (it reminded me of my disasterous attempt at tap dance in 1993). Of course, I 've danced at parties and in clubs, so I knew how to move my hips, but in class where I could see myself in the mirrors, it wasn't pretty. I kept at it, and at the end of the summer, she asked me again (even after witnessing my lack of coordination and rhythm).
I said yes, and I am happy to report that at 31 years old, I actually feel like a dancer. My body looks better and I feel great. My debut with the company took place in December right before my birthday, and from all accounts, I did well. Of course, these were reviews from people who love me and would never want to hurt my feelings, but I believe that I was alright. I won't be joining Alvin Ailey or American Ballet Theatre any time soon, but I was pleased. Our next big performance is on Sunday.
The good thing about being back in dance class is that it gives me a few hours to focus on myself without any guilt. I often feel that whenever I take time to focus on myself, it is at the expense of something else more important. Whenever I go shopping, I feel guilty about the money I'm spending. If I decide to eat out, I feel guilty about the food that I'm not eating in my fridge. If I blow off a project that I should be working on for a client or around the house, I feel guilty about the time I'm wasting. However, no one ever feels bad about working out, so I've justified the time I spend in dance class as my work-out time. Its a workout that I can enjoy, just as the women in my jazz class who refer to it as happy hour, which is not something you hear said too often about the gym.
By the way, I think I'm getting the hang of this blog thing. It is pretty cool. I am not sure how people will find their way to my page to read it though, so I'll have to figure that one out over the course of the week. I read someone else's blog last night about Boston sports teams. I don't recall how I got to his page, but then again, his team did just win the Super Bowl. He had been blogging long enough to have archives, so that is pretty cool. I wonder if I'll ever write enough to have an archives page someday...
Ciao!
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