Saturday, February 12, 2005

Mad at Mike!

Last night I caught a glimpse of the TV interview with Corey Feldman. He and Martin Bashir sat down to talk about Feldman's previous relationship with Michael Jackson. Last night, I was angry with Corey for trying to re-start his career at Michael's expense, but as of this morning, I've re-directed my fury at Mike for being so stupid.

This is hard for me to say, but I cannot believe that Michael Jackson is as innocent as he claims. I don't know what happened between him and these boys, but now, I can no longer go along with the idea that Mike is being set up. If anything, Michael did this to himself, and this is why I am so upset.

Years ago, I was such a huge fan. I collected the buttons for my jacket, had several posters on my bedroom wall, and I begged my mother to let me go to the concert here at RFK stadium in 1984. I had "Off the Wall" and "Thriller" which played everyday until I wore out the needle on the record player. I even tried to dress the part--white glove, high-water pants and white socks (hey, it was the 80s).

But, I got older and by the time I got to high school and discovered boys my own age, Michael diminished as an object of my affection and simply became apart of the clutter on my bedroom wall of hip-hop stars and teen angst poetry.

As I grew up, Michael continued to act like a person stuck in perpetual childhood. We all felt so sorry for this man who was forced into stardom by the adults in his life, and we excused his odd behavior as his attempts to relive his youth. But I am no longer convinced that it ever made sense to give Mike a pass for acting stupid. Other child stars had crappy childhoods (just ask Gary Coleman) and there are plenty of children who suffer through worse.

So, I'm sorry Mike. Just because you were exploited as a child, it doesn't give you the right to exploit other children, including your own. As much as I hate to do this, I'm going to have to let my affection for you go until you grow up and start acting like a man. No more excuses about your abusive father, your fading complexion and grotesque plastic surgeries, and your seductions of vulnerable children and their greedy families. Its all an illusion that you created.
Yes, I believe that you are a victim, but you are more a victim of your own indulgences.

Now, I am not condemning you as guilty in this recent case. I strongly believe in your right to a fair trial, and I am pissed by all of the news coverage which have been overly prejudicial and more likely to result in mistrial. In my heart, there is a glimmer of hope that you are not guilty in this case, because my childhood fantasies of you would be ruined. But neither of us are children anymore, are we?

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