I Have Good Intentions

But I'm still headed on that road to Hades. Maybe, but it seems that way sometimes.

Take my blogging habit, for instance. I'm supposed to do this everyday so that I write something every day. Only, nowadays, I go days between posts even though that is hardly my intention. I intend to write, but somehow I just don't keep up with it like I should.

I should do as the great Yoda suggests, and not 'try'...I must DO what I intend.

Otherwise, I am useless as a human being. I become a failure.

I am not sure what else I intended to write today. I sat on the couch and watched two episodes of "Desperate Housewives" and that kept me occupied for the evening. I probably could have written something, but then again, I can't remember if I was at all inspired to do so earlier.

I intend to be a better lawyer, but I've got to do a better job of keeping promises and appointments. I get where I need to eventually, but somewhere along the line, there is this creeping feeling that I could be a lot better if I just got my act together. I intend to be a better wife, but I just never feel like doing that much housework. I intend to be an attentive gardener, but today it got dark and I just couldn't balance the need to plant veggies with the need to clean my kitchen. I intend to be a better dancer, but then again, you can only work with the tools God gave you...

My life is a mess! I owe it all to my Adult Hyper-Active Attention Deficit Disorder. I have AHAADD. However, this is my own diagnosis of my issues, so I could be wrong (hey, I'm a lawyer, not a doctor).

And I am un-medicated. Apparently if I take some of the medications that get advertised on TV, I will be more focused, but I will lose interest in sex, eating, sleep, joy and life in general. What fun would it be to be on time for things, but not to enjoy the experience? I think I'll remain the mess that I've become.

At least until I have children. If my daily drama interferes with my ability to be a good mother, then I will get my act together the best way possible. I'll move back in my with my parents.

That's enough to scare anyone straight. Ciao!